The Power of Choice

Many of us have contemplated suicide. I did as a 20-year-old in a painful relationship. I likened my state of mind to that of being trapped down a mineshaft, with the roof collapsed upon me. It was dark, pitch black, and I felt claustrophobia, stuck within a narrow passage with no way upwards, downwards or outwards. I lay, curled up. And I lay, and I lay.

I had a choice. I could remain there and succeed at suicide. Or, as I finally chose, I could notice options. I began to listen to a tiny part of me tell the rest of me that I was more, I deserved better, I could leave this stuck and painful place.

As the Buddhists say, pain is inevitable, suffering is not.

I began to hear voices as I lay there in my mineshaft, the sound of rescuers above me, and finally saw a glimpse of daylight as the surface soil was cleared. I became one of you who chose to climb out of the black pit.

Then commit to your personal growth as a way to reclaim your power.

Notice the cost of the groups or courses. If they are free, the people who are leading them may have a poverty mentality, or are struggling with knowing what they deserve in life. Others, of course, fully believe that to be spiritual, one has to be poor. This is not true. Finding the balance between too little and too much is the single most important lesson many spiritual teachers wrestle with today, on every level - including financially.

Channeled teachings from many well known sources all seem to voice the same opinion when it comes to merging money with spirituality. Only when each of us, as human beings, truly understand that God is within us and that we are all divine beings, here to heal and accept abundance on every level - will we finally let go of this poverty space many of us live within. To dishonor our abundance, is to dishonor our divinity.

The same goes for our innate ability to heal and be healers. We are all so good at giving (some of us even become martyrs), and we are mostly very underdeveloped at receiving. True and powerful healers can only really give, if they have learned the gift of receiving. It is not the only way around, folks!

And, in order to work with energy, lift curses and develop protection of the highest degree, personal growth and self-responsibility is the only choice one can make.

It takes courage for a brave soul to travel backwards in order to go forwards. It takes a decision to grow, without really knowing what the end result will look like. Our egos battle with us as they realize that they may be left behind in this battle to discover your real self under all those layers of grime and dirt.

And, to continue is the key. Rewards come in small measures and you grab onto them as they show up in your life, as they tell you that yes, you are doing the right thing, you have made the right decision, and yes, that there is more to you and to what you deserve in this lifetime than you realize at this point.

But how do you grow upwards to your desired level of deservability?

It can be simple, or it can be hard.

The smartest thing about simple growth is that you don't need a degree in order to achieve it! You don't even need a diploma or a certificate of any academic kind. Academia is so limited - it's a little like walking through life with one leg - and yet, we have brought up to believe that intellectualism and academia is the crucial to our success as human beings and contributors to this planet.

To be purely an academic in life is to journey through this planet on your hands and knees. There's only so much you can reach and see.

Start researching the basic truth of this: self-esteem is connected to who you are, not what you do.

Next, widen your definition of Success.

Success to me is having the ability to experience a functional and loving relationship with a partner and children. Success is about being in integrity with who you are and asking for what you need, despite fear of disapproval. Success is soft and self-nurturing. Success is about coming from a heart space, with all you meet in life. Success is being open to all the good and abundance in the universe, on every level - whether it is in the form of a powerful, available partner, radiant health or financial ease.

This is what we are truly here to learn - not to collect framed certificates or win battles so that our egos can feel better about themselves! A big, flashy car can often indicate an insecure driver, for instance, rather than someone who really feels prosperity inwardly!

So start by believing that you possess all the qualifications to change your life and reclaim your power, right now.

A decision to grow new thoughts and affirmations and habits, and release old blocks is the first step. This shifts the energy on an imperceptible level, like a harbor bridge opening to allow a fully masted ship through its space. Doors will open and you will begin to notice opportunities, workshops, courses, teachers and intuitive insights all around you.

What if you arrived here as a human being fully equipped with everything you needed inside yourself to steer through the array of challenges and opportunities for growth on your journey? Faith is the key to opening ourselves.

Once the decision to surrender into healing, to let go of something that has held you back for so long is made - the rest is purely research. There are a myriad of alternative healing therapies to choose from, and an extensive search for the right therapy, with the right person at the right time for the right price begins.

The majority of my own emotional and physical healing was facilitated over six years through selective personal growth workshops, rebirthing, hypnotherapy, bowen therapy, deep tissue massage, kinesiology (or 'Touch for Health'), sacral cranial and osteopathy work, iridology, Bach flower remedies, Australian Flower Essences and homeopathy. Others are particularly drawn to Feldenkrais, Reiki or bodywork. The list is endless, and I urge you, like any discerning consumer, to shop around, take your time and get many opinions.

Once I had recovered and discovered my physical self-identity, I then concentrated on my sense of spirit. My spiritual healing then took over my journey.

It feels crucial that we all reconnect with our powerful spiritual ancestry as goddesses and gods, and relight our spark of divinity, until it burns increasingly brighter and more potent as we ground ourselves into this knowledge.

No matter how different, how bad, how isolated we have ever felt during our lifetime, the closer we move back to our sense of Oneness with all living things, the more powerful we will become, on every level. And, the more effective we will become as Healers.

I believe that, in addition to our own particular karmas, we are all here on this planet, at this time, in these bodies - to heal.

To find your healing ability, the first step is to consciously heal and love yourself, getting rid of emotional baggage that holds you back and releasing yourself from past trauma. This is a journey in itself and will never be complete, but to begin it will shift your energy towards that of a healer tremendously.